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Dirty-South Blues Harp forum: wail on! >
OT: The longest gig of my life...
OT: The longest gig of my life...
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HawkeyeKane
807 posts
Mar 26, 2012
12:41 PM
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Our show on Saturday night turned out to be one of the longest and hardest nights of my life...
It was an out of town gig, so as usual, our guitarist rode with me. We were running a little behind and arrived about ten minutes later than we usually do. First thing that seemed a little off was that our bandleader, who owns, transports, sets up, and operates our PA was not as far along on the setup as he normally is when the two of us arrive. But it was a room we'd never played before, so I didn't give it much thought since there could've been little oddball issues before I had gotten there.
Then I noticed that our bandleader (yes, I know I've mentioned him by name before, but for this post, all parties shall remain nameless) was simply not himself. He was very irate. He had quit smoking cigarettes cold turkey almost two weeks ago, and was trying to make several other changes to his lifestyle with vitamins and exercise, so a potential catalyst was already in play. We were having trouble with PA gremlins, main one being an ungodly buzz coming from the monitor speakers. Trouble with the monitors isn't an uncommon occurrence. They're late model JBL EONs, and they've been nothing but trouble from day one, so while I was concerned about it, I still wasn't surprised. But he got so frustrated and pissed off by it that he yanked out the cables and kicked the speaker across the floor.
Then I noticed that his voice was very quiet and his speech was not very articulate. He was also walking with an odd sort of limp. At the time I chalked it up to exhaustion, because while we play out on the weekends once or twice a week, he also runs at least one open jam, and works on many other side projects throughout the week.
It wasn't until we kicked off the first set that we all began to realize that something was definitely wrong.
His guitar playing was incredibly slow. He was singing off key. He kept throwing off his timing. He was slurring his words and kept asking for shots of Southern Comfort to try and clear up what he said was a voice lost from hoarseness. By the end of the first set, we had all come to think that he had overdone the shots and gotten drunk before we had even started. This never happens. He knows better.
The first break was full of uncertainty amongst us. How the hell were we gonna keep this going? We don't have a great number of songs in our repertoire that we can perform without him. Not to mention the fact that while the rest of us all have day jobs or are retired with full pension, he makes his career out of doing this week after week. We didn't want this to become a blight for him that could irreparably damage his living. Our guitarist managed to make a few adjustments to improve the sorry state of the PA, and we plunged into the second set.
It only got worse. The slurred speech deepened, he began repeating himself, he kept forgetting people's names, he made political references (normally a major aversion of his), and he seemed to keep singling out a couple of audience members and talking to them between songs.
By the time we finished the second set, I felt like having a nervous breakdown. Not only was it scary, but it was highly embarrassing. This had never happened before, and I did NOT like it. Then, our leader began returning the PA to his original configuration, negating all the adjustments our guitarist had made. That sent our guitarist over the edge and he got our leader outside to try and get through to him. This led to a shouting match between the two, with our leader not listening to reason in any way, claiming that there was nothing wrong. The management then came out and asked if we needed to call the rest of the show off. THAT was truly embarrassing. But we convinced the owner that we would get through it one way or another.
Finally, everyone got calmed down. It was then that his wife informed us all that he really HADN'T had all that much to drink. Two shots before we got started, and that's not enough to screw him up with his constitution. So now the leading possibility for his behavior was some kind of blood sugar issue. To everyone's knowledge, including his own, he isn't diabetic. But with all the changes he'd been making in his daily routine, he may have developed an insulin imbalance. So we tried getting and orange juice and honey mixture into him, hoping it would counter whatever was ailing him and maybe help his hoarse throat.
It didn't have any noticeable effect. By the time we were getting ready to kick off the third set, the crowd was pretty much aware that something was up, and me and my fellow bandmates' feelings had gone from being miffed and embarrassed over our thought that he was drunk, to genuine fear and worry for our leader's health. I went to the bar to get a refill for myself, and the owner came up to me and asked if he was just wasted. I told him no, he wasn't drunk. There was something else wrong, but we weren't sure what.
We plodded through the third and fourth sets, the fourth one finally showing some signs of improvement in him, but it was marginal. He got up on chairs to play his guitar several times, which led him to miss his cues on coming back in on the vocals. We were all trying to compensate and cover as best we could.
When we finally wrapped it up and began tearing down, it was revealed that the reason the monitors buzzed so horribly was because the mixing board had no power to it when he was testing them. He would never have missed that had he been in touch.
When all was said and done, the owner was very understanding and paid us the agreed amount, which was a godsend considering. He was still fairly belligerent as we loaded up, and his wife, keeping us all abreast of how he was doing throughout the day yesterday, said that he was argumentative with her about driving home, was "chewing cud" on the ride back, and foamed at the mouth in his sleep at home. He was still irritable and his speech still wasn't up to snuff the next morning. We split that evening after getting his promise that he would go in and get himself medically checked out ASAP, which is surprising because he is very reprehensive about seeking a doctor unless he's in unbearable pain.
There are two likely possibilities as to what happened to him...
One is that he may have gotten slipped a Mickey at our gig Friday night. Entirely possible. The bar we played that night is not in the most savory of Springfield neighborhoods and it sometimes gets a flock of riffraff later in the evening. It also turns out that his ex and her trouble-making boyfriend were both there and giving him nasty looks the entire night. It wouldn't be unfathomable to think that they'd do something like that.
But the other possibility is more worrisome. The whole combination of his condition were signs pointing to a transient ischemic attack, a mini-stroke as it were. Any of you with medical knowledge are probably aware that these can often be a precursor to a full-fledged stroke or silent stroke.
You may wonder why I'm going into such detail on this. Well, suffice it to say that it really was a downright frightening experience that I don't want to relive anytime soon. In the three years I've known him, my bandleader has become my best friend outside my wife. I owe him a lot for numerous things. For our friendship, for taking me under his wing in the local music scene, for helping me through some very rough personal issues....I could go on. He's worked hard to make it as far as he has, and my bandmates and I all consider ourselves pretty damn lucky to be playing with the hardest working entertainer in town. We all share a sense of pride and joy in the band we helped him create.
I've been writing this post over the span of my work day, and I just got a text from him saying that he's feeling better. But God help him if something like this happens to him again. He's always had an enormous amount of energy and endurance, and he displays it both onstage and off. But to see someone you know, care about, and work with get reduced into someone who seems handicapped and unrecognizable...that's something I hope I never have to go through again, and hope none of you have to endure it either.
Better wrap this up. As I said, he seems to be better now. But please keep him in your thoughts and prayers.
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Hawkeye Kane
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Willspear
102 posts
Mar 26, 2012
12:52 PM
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Man that sounds terrible.
I have played with people who are wasted and it always is bad but never had I played with someone who was possibly having a severe medical issue. I can't even imagine the stress in the moment.
As for that friend/bandleader I hope it works out.
Ps quitting smoking is rough. The amount of mental impact it can have is crazy.
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HawkeyeKane
808 posts
Mar 26, 2012
1:25 PM
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Just found out that one of our band's regular attendees was micked earlier last week to the point of waking up in a bar she had no memory going to and going in for a rape kit. Seems that people about town have decided to have some fun with these bastardly little concoctions.
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Hawkeye Kane
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nacoran
5458 posts
Mar 26, 2012
1:57 PM
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Always keep an eye on your beverages; it's a rough night when a mickey is possibly the better option. I hope he's okay. I hope he gets a full workup to rule out anything stroke related too. Good luck to you and your band, and especially to him.
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Nate
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XHarp
476 posts
Mar 26, 2012
5:48 PM
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HK, there are a lot of reasons for mood swings and personality changes like that. All of the obvious ones are blood sugar, vitamin deficiencies, and substance abuse.
Regardless of which one it is, get him to admit to it and seek help. We nearly lost my father in law last Tuesday to nothing more then potassium deficiency. Over the course of months it Affected his heart, circulation, and he was increasingly disoriented. Doc told us that we got it in time. Next step was severe heat attack.
Don't chalk it up to an anomaly. Apart from affecting your band and the music you could be losing a really good friend.
Good Luck with it.
X
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"Keep it in your mouth" - XHarp
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jbone
845 posts
Mar 26, 2012
8:40 PM
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believe me, you do not want to lose a friend like that. you make SURE he's getting the attention he needs medically. he may really need you to be the bad cop here and get him to see someone and get some tests done.
i lost a dear friend nearly 9 years ago, a band mate and really a brother. i still miss him. there seemed to be nothing i could do and it was a shock that he passed the way he did, but looking back there were signs.
if it IS a mickey i would avoid the places to people hang out like plague or at least guard my beverage and/or food like a mama bear. it takes a particularly low m-fer to do something like that but i remember one night in a strange city, having to walk my brother about 5 miles to our place after someone slipped him some ludes and we got kicked out of the bar. his "friend" who did that to him would not give us a ride home and i nearly kicked his ass over it. if i had ever seen him again i ma7y not be here writing this.
Hawkeye, take the tine to reach out to your friend.
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markdc70
109 posts
Mar 26, 2012
8:42 PM
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I have always considered "mickeys" to be some sort of a paranoia created urban myth that our mothers warned us about. I'm not doubting Hawkeye, but what exactly is this drug? The only thing similar to this that I know existed is the "Rufie" aka date rape drug. Is this the same thing? I hope your friend is doing well and it wasn't anything with long-term effects.
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jbone
846 posts
Mar 27, 2012
3:52 AM
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a mickey was originally liquid opium administered in wine or tea. much later it was chloral hydrate in liquor or a mixed drink. come to think of it my oldest sister was slipped lsd at the premier of 2001: A Space Oddyssey back in '69 or '70. that might sound funny or like a good time but any time a person is given drugs unwillingly, to me that's a form of deadly assault. acts like that have the power to ruin lives and kill people.
when my wife was a teen an opponent put something in her soft drink at a chess tournament and she had to forfeit the tourney.
this is more prevalent than people realize. i just remembered these last 2 incidents and here's another: a girl friend long ago was at dinner with a guy before we dated and he apparently slipped a tranquilizer into her wine. she ended up at the e-r and he later admitted he'd done that to her as "a joke". more like a shot at getting her into bed "the easy way".
so no, this is far from mythical. it's a low point of human nature to make an assault like this on another person. no apologies here, this makes my blood fairly boil.
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