I'm going to do a YouTube video in which I talk about, and tell, harmonica player jokes.
Please post your favorites here. I'm shamelessly crowdsourcing this. I will NOT credit you individually, unless you make me laugh so hard that I piss in my pants. (If that happens, I won't talk about it; I'll just credit you and outsource the blowjob somewhere down the line.)
Tremolo harmonica walks in to a bar. All the other harmonicas sort of cower off to the sides, make room respectfully as he takes a seat, look down or stop talking if they catch him looking at them. Trem orders a drink, enjoys it, leaves a generous tip, walks out. All the richter harps breathe a sigh of relief. Bartender turns to one of them & says, "He seems like a nice guy, how come everybody acted so scared of him?" Richter says "Oh, he's nice enough...as long as you don't try to cross him."
Why are there no psychology students playing the harmonica? Freud! ---------- Wisdom does not always come with old age. Sometimes old age arrives alone.
Q: What's the difference between a Harmonica and an onion? A: Nobody cries when you chop up a Harmonica.
Q: What did the Harp Player get on his I.Q. Test? A: Saliva.
Q: What is the difference between a Harmonica player and a vacuum cleaner? A: You have to plug one of them in before it sucks.
Perfect Pitch: When you throw a Harmonica into the toilet and it doesn't hit the sides.
Believe me, I have nothing against Harp players... I've even been accused of being one a few times but, let's face it... They have a reputation of being run of the mill and a little hard to tolerate. (Ask most any guitarist)
Present Company Excepted & No Insult Intended.
Last Edited by skarekrow on Jan 13, 2017 12:54 PM
A harmonica player walks into a music theory class...
That's the whole joke!
I had a longer joke written, but it needs more work. It's dirtier than it needs to be to for a marginal payoff. ---------- Nate Facebook Thread Organizer (A list of all sorts of useful threads)
Q. How many harmonica players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Five. One to screw it in and four to determine if it should be in straight or cross position.
Q. How many Harmonica Players does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Only one, but he'll go through a whole box of bulbs before he finds the right one.
Q: What's the range of a harmonica? A: Twenty yards if you've got a good arm!
Q: What is the perfect weight for a harmonica player? A: 3 and a half pounds including the urn.
A young child told his mother "When I grow up I'm going to play the harmonica." His mother responded "Well honey, you know you can't do both."
Q: Why do musicians leave their harmonicas on the dashboard? A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
A group of terrorists hijacked a plane full of harmonica players. They called ground control with a list of demands. Then they told the negotiator if their demands aren't met they will release one harmonica player an hour.
Many of them are the same as trombone jokes. This one, though, is not, and it's one of my favorites:
Q: What's the difference between a harmonica player and god? A: God doesn't think he's a harmonica player.
Last Edited by kudzurunner on Jan 14, 2017 9:36 AM
If you throw a guitar player and a harmonica player off a cliff, who will hit the ground first? The guitar player, because the harp player will have to stop and ask what key he's supposed to play in.
How many harmonica players does it take to change a light bulb? Five: one to change the bulb and four to talk about how Little Walter would have done it.
How do you get a harmonica player out of a tree? Cut the rope.
What is a gentleman? A guy who can play harmonica but doesn't.
What is very easy to lift but very hard to pick up properly? A harmonica.
What is long, hard, is often in a man's pants and if used in the appropriate rhythmic manner, while paying very close attention to one's partner(s), can give other people a great deal of pleasure? A harmonica.
How do you break a harmonica player's finger? Kick him in the nose. ---------- Wisdom does not always come with old age. Sometimes old age arrives alone.
